Through the Darkness
by Claire57
Summary: What happened during the month that the Taelon mothership was missing and everyone presumed dead, before its return at the beginning of "Point of No Return"?


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Through the Darkness

By Claire Boston

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Spoilers: Takes place at the end of "Dark Horizons". Also, some stuff from the new book "Heritage".

Disclaimer: They're not mine. Wish they were; I'd treat 'em better. Don't sue me, I've got a really nasty, eager lawyer/judge who does my paperwork…

Rating: PG, mature themes. Later pieces may be PG-13 or NC-17 but they'll be noted.

Summary: In "Point of No Return", Renee argues to Hubble Urick that saving the Taelons is the right thing to do, that the destiny of Humans and Taelons is joined together. Yet even as recently as the events of "Epiphany", she still seemed to feel hatred for the Taelons and what they had done to Earth. How did she come to this change of heart (assuming it's not just sloppy writing on the part of Tribune/Atlantis again)? And what happened during the month that the Taelon mothership was missing and everyone presumed dead, before its return at the beginning of "Point of No Return"?

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Part 1

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As the Mothership plunged into ID space barely ahead of the blast unleashed by the Jaridian battle cruiser, Renee heaved a sigh of relief. Once again, they had cheated death, or so it seemed. But the Mothership was sorely lacking in energy reserves, with barely enough to initiate the portal into ID space.

She had looked to Liam, there on the bridge of the Mothership, and his glance seemed to say that it wasn't over yet. They still had to deal with Sandoval. And with Zo'or. Sandoval stood locked in place, still encased in the Jaridian replicant armor, with a frozen look of torment on his tear-streaked face. For the moment, the Jaridians were the least of their problems….

Later, as Sandoval touched the marks of the Jaridian armor on his face, gave one last smirk and turned toward Zo'or who was seated once again upon his thronelike command chair, Renee felt a rush of anger toward the Implant. After all Liam had done for him, all he had suffered through at the hands of the Jaridians, Sandoval just walked away as if it meant nothing! As she opened her mouth to vent another scathing barb toward the agent, she was interrupted by the sound of several alarms going off at once.

"What is it? What is happening?" Zo'or's usual veneer of arrogant command was back in place now that the Jaridians were no longer aboard.

Sandoval moved to the control console to the left of the command chair. "The ship's drives have only minutes left until the power reserves are exhausted." He raised his eyes to Zo'or, pausing a moment to let the Taelon fix his eyes on Sandoval's impassive face. "We had enough core energy to allow us to enter ID space and escape the Jaridian battle cruiser, but the engines require more than we have available in order to complete our return to Earth." 

"Are we still within Jaridian space?" Zo'or seemed to welcome this crisis, perhaps as something that he could manage, could control. His eyes were still strangely bright, and he held himself with the air of someone who was trying to convince himself that everything was normal, was under control. But Renee had seen the fear in him earlier. Liam moved to one of the monitors, and began calling up information on their current location in space.

"Yes, we passed into Taelon-controlled space approximately fifteen minutes ago." Sandoval's voice was calm, uninflected. Renee looked at Liam, and noticed the scowl deepening on his face.

"You have a concern, Major?" Somehow, Zo'or managed to sound sarcastic and concerned at once. He shifted in his chair, curling his fingers over the ends of the arms and leaning forward slightly as he looked to Liam for an answer.

Liam was slow in answering. "There are navigational markers for this area that I'm not familiar with. Calling up the main database now…" Suddenly he reached for the main navigational controls, calling them up with an almost frantic wave. "Taking us out of ID space NOW!" He was moving his hands as swiftly as he could, with an air almost of desperation.

Zo'or half-rose to his feet, still gripping the arms of his chair. "Major, what is the meaning of this? I gave no such order!" Sandoval was scowling down at his console. "Zo'or, there is a major distortion in ID space directly ahead of us. I've never seen anything like it before." Sandoval's voice was surprised, which caused Zo'or to turn and look at him instead. As Zo'or started to demand that Sandoval explain, the Mothership began to shudder and jerk, causing Renee to almost lose her balance.

__

The Mothership's inertial dampers block out all but the most severe motion, she thought. _And we're still shaking this badly. _She felt a shiver of fear as she watched Liam give the final command to return the ship to normal space. Through the virtual glass of the bridge, the stars, and something else, wavered into sight.

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Part 2

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For a moment, everyone was silent at the sight. Whatever it was, Renee decided, it was definitely something they didn't want to get close to. She finally turned to Liam. "What is it?"

Liam looked down at the data he had called up from the main navigational banks. "It's a paired gravitational anomaly." As if that explained it, Renee thought. Oh, well. 

"What, exactly, is a 'paired gravitational anomaly'? And why did you drop us out of ID space? I thought we couldn't afford to waste any energy?"

"We didn't have any choice, Miss Palmer." Sandoval's voice was, for once, sincere. "If we had continued our course, we would have passed too close to the anomaly, and the distortions it causes in ID space would have caused us to use even more energy, energy that we cannot afford to waste."

Renee was still puzzled. "But what is it?" She looked to Liam.

"It's a very rare phenomenon, mostly because it isn't very stable for more than a few million years." As Renee took a breath to ask her next question, Liam continued. "It's a black hole and a white hole, orbiting each other."

"A white hole? You mean like the one at the center of the Milky Way galaxy?"

Liam nodded. "Yes, but not all white holes are that large. Some are smaller and more visible. We call them quasars. Each one is the outlet for all the energy that is sucked into a black hole, somewhere else. 

Zo'or spoke up, surprising Renee who had almost forgotten he was there. "What is unusual about these two, Miss Palmer, is that they are in relatively close proximity. Each distorts the fabric of space, and they are close enough, astronomically speaking, that they are affecting each other, and all of space for some distance around them. Because of their nature, this distortion is significant enough to affect ID space as well. Hence our navigational markings.

"Eventually, of course, the white hole will be pulled into the black hole, and the two will disappear from this universe, creating a new connection directly between the two. But that will not occur for at least a half a million years."

"That's why I had to drop us out of ID space, Renee." Liam took up the explanation from Zo'or. "We were beginning to hit the distortions they're causing in ID space, and at this point the ship isn't capable of withstanding the added stresses if we got much closer." 

"O-kay. So what do we do now?" Renee's tone was more normal, she hoped. But she still wasn't sure how much worse things were now. Liam seemed to sense her concern, and answered her question before she could ask it. "We're not in any immediate danger here, Renee. But dropping out of ID space does mean that we'll need to use additional energy to reenter it, to return to Earth. And right now it's energy that we don't have."

Da'an's voice was soft. "Then we must obtain it, however we may." They hadn't realized that he had entered the bridge. Zo'or seemed to draw himself up into his usual haughty stare. "And just where do you suggest that we 'obtain' it, Da'an? Are you willing to give up the last of your core energy to save the rest of us?" His tone was challenging.

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Part 3

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Da'an simply looked at Zo'or without speaking. Then he turned to Liam and Renee. "The Jaridians will be pursuing us, although without ID drive technology, we have a measure of time before they are able to track us." He looked at Sandoval for a moment, then turned back to Liam and Renee. "We must attempt to channel all available energy to the ship's main engines."

Liam looked thoughtful. "We have most of the shuttles and warships docked on board. We could transfer all of the core energy from each of them to the ship's main engines. That might be enough to get us back to Earth." 

"Yes, that may be enough. Let us begin." Da'an turned to leave the bridge, but then his façade slipped momentarily as he stumbled. Liam reached out a hand to steady him, but Da'an waved him away. He looked into Liam's eyes for a moment, then spoke. "I shall return to the stasis deck. Perhaps those with sufficient energy and appropriate skills may be of assistance." He slowly continued to make his way off the bridge as Liam exchanged a glance with Renee. Sandoval watched them, then looked down at his console.

During this exchange Zo'or had remained silent, seated in his command chair. Now, however, he rose and turned to Sandoval. "You will assist in this as well, Agent Sandoval. I recommend that you begin with all due haste. Dismissed." He haughtily turned his chair away, facing toward the virtual glass window that allowed him to gaze out on the anomaly. Sandoval glanced up at Liam and Renee, then turned and exited the bridge. More slowly, Liam and Renee followed. 

*******

Over the next week, the three humans worked to recover any remaining core energy from the docked shuttles and other Taelon vessels. They quickly fell into a routine, with little or no discussion. Liam and Renee worked together for roughly a half a day, then Sandoval took over while the two of them rested. They had little contact with each other, and this was satisfactory to all parties.

Although most of the four hundred-plus Taelons preferred to remain in or near the stasis deck, several Taelons with appropriate skills also worked to complete the energy transfers, as well as to assist in routine oversight of the ship. Renee was surprised to find herself working closely and harmoniously alongside those she considered the enemies of her species.

"Miss Palmer?" The voice behind her was soft. Renee turned her head, holding the connection that allowed the core energy to transfer from the shuttle's main drive into the portable energy storage device. The being's soft glow added only a small amount of light to the drive compartment. With their core energy waning, the remaining Taelons were conserving as much as they could. Their human facades required energy to maintain; not much, but at this late and desperate date any unnecessary use of energy was being avoided. So the Taelon in the doorway behind her was in his natural state, albeit one that was dimmer and more subdued that she had ever seen until these last few days.

"Yes, Sa'ron? I'm almost finished with this one, and then we can take both of the canisters down to the main engines." Renee assumed he wanted to know when she would be finished; her voice was cool and businesslike. But she couldn't help her reaction of surprise at Sa'ron's next words.

"Miss Palmer, do you consider yourself to be my enemy?" Sa'ron's tone was calm and unemotional, at least it would have appeared so to most of those humans who dealt with the Taelons. But Renee had had much more contact with Taelons than most humans, and had learned to read the small signs of emotion in the measured tones and in the often restless movements of fingers and eyes. Sa'ron was in the grip of strong emotions.

Renee's tone was carefully neutral. "Humans and Taelons are allies, working together to…" Her words trailed off at his raised hand. She allowed the last trickle of energy to flow into the canister, then carefully released the connection that she had been holding open and turned on her knees to face the Taelon.

"No, Miss Palmer. I do not want to hear the carefully prepared words that you use when speaking as the head of Doors' Co-Ventures." He looked at her directly and almost challengingly. "I am no longer young, Miss Palmer. I have been a member of the Synod since before Zo'or was born, more than 900 years ago, and a senior member for longer than your human nation has existed. I am near the end of my days, and the end of my species. My time is limited, and I have no more patience for lies and deceptions."

Renee took a deep breath, weighing out her next words. 

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Part 4

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"I believe that the Taelons have hidden their true purpose in coming to Earth from us. That in and of itself is not criminal. However, the Taelons have used humans for their own purposes, without our knowledge or consent, and have violated our most sacred principles: respect for human life, the right to make our own choices, and to choose our own destiny. And by withholding your reasons for coming to Earth, you have not only denied us the right to choose whether or not to aid you, you have also denied yourselves any benefits to be gained from that aid, freely given." She paused, and took a deep breath. Sa'ron seemed to be gazing at her with a calm expression, and not drawing back in denial as she might have expected. She rose to her feet, and kept her gaze as calm and level as she could, given that her heart was beating wildly with the force of her emotions. "You have said yourselves that you do not understand human emotions. And by not trusting us, by not telling us that you were dying and that you desperately needed our help to stop it, you haven't been able to tap into the full depth of human potential to solve your problem."

"That potential can't be forced, or taken by force. Even we humans don't understand it fully ourselves." Renee looked down at her hands as they held the energy canister, then up to meet Sa'ron's eyes once again. "But I do know that humans have the ability to rise above their own limitations, to reach beyond what is reasonable and logical, and to achieve things that are believed to be impossible."

The Taelon gave a nod, as if he were in some fashion satisfied by her answer. She didn't know whether it was because he had expected her honesty, or because he was surprised by it. Although she had had dealings with him for nearly a week now, she didn't know him at all, other than by reputation from Liam. His next words surprised her. "The Synod has come to agree with you, Miss Palmer. Although I fear that it is too little, too late." His tone surprised her; she had a momentary sense that he was being absolutely honest with her.

She gave a little smile as she recalled something that her kid brother had often quoted to her when she ran into some problem that she couldn't solve. "'The only way to know the limits of the possible is to go beyond them into the impossible.'" Sa'ron looked briefly startled at her words. "It's part of human nature to never give up, even in the face of insurmountable odds. And if you've studied our history, then you know that we have overcome the odds many times. With the right motivation, and for what we consider the right reasons." She continued, even though the common sense part of her was warning her to quit while she was ahead, "And so far the Taelons haven't give us the right reasons." Her tone hardened. "You take what you want, wherever you want, and with no consideration for those you take from. You value no life other than your own. Then you leave behind dying or dead worlds, or abandon them for the Jaridians to scour of all life. And you show no remorse, no sense that what you are doing is wrong! And you want us to help you survive, so that you can continue to destroy whole worlds and whole species?!" 

She took a deep breath, but she was too worked up to stop now. "In my opinion, the Taelons deserve to die. And the Jaridians, too. It will be doing the rest of the universe a big favor."

Sa'ron looked taken aback at the force of her words. Fingers moving restlessly, he looked down at his own hands, then up to look her full in the face. His movements gave away that it was an effort; it seemed that this conversation had not gone the way that he expected. Glancing briefly aside, he returned his gaze to her face, then, hesitantly, spoke. His words were soft enough that she had to strain to hear. "Your criticism is not…unfounded, Miss Palmer. If I could change it, I would." He paused again, and seemed to be searching for words. "We have given up much in our search to evolve. It is a search that I fear has failed, for we have lost much in the doing. We know that now, and it is partly because of you that we have learned this." 

"Me? What do you mean? What did I do?" She didn't know what he was talking about. She felt a momentary sense of panic; was he talking about her activities in the Resistance? The Taelons knew that she was involved with the ANA through her position with DI, but that was political. She had kept her activities as a senior leader of the Resistance, then as a senior ANA operative, secret.

Sa'ron's fingers continued their restless movements. "As you know, when Zo'or had your brother's emotions removed, he ordered them to be given to Da'an. Although his reasons were selfish, Da'an was actually the best choice. His long association with humans, and his search to understand your people have made him the most knowledgeable among us for things human." He paused, then continued. "When your brother's emotions were returned to him, Da'an retained the ability to feel and to understand both love and fear. And he has shared that knowledge with the rest of us through the Commonality."

Renee stared at him in amazement. "You…feel…?" She didn't know what to say.

"Yes. We…feel. And now we know loss, and the grief that accompanies it." Sa'ron gazed at her, and his expression seemed to hold sadness. "And it is because of your brother's love for you, and his fear of losing you. Both are strong within him, and now they are strong within the Commonality."

"I…don't know what to say," Renee's words were hesitant. This was NOT something that she had expected. For once, her fabled ability to think on her feet was absent. 

"There is nothing that you need say, Miss Palmer. Nor is there anything to be done. But I wish to thank you. For even as we descend into death, you have given us a gift that is beyond value. For we have come to value the short time that we have left, and to be able to mourn it's passing." He looked at her wordlessly for a moment, then slowly turned and made his way across the landing bay. She stood and watched him go, and couldn't think of anything to say.

She finished the row of shuttles in a somber, thoughtful mood. As she carried the canisters to the main engine room, she was lost in thought, and almost collided with Liam as he turned from the master control console.

"Renee! Are you alright? Here, let me help with those." Liam's eyes showed that he had noticed her air of preoccupation. He took the rack of canisters, and set them on the floor next to the console. "What's wrong?"

She bit her lip before answering. "I just had an …unsettling…conversation with Sa'ron." Her words were hesitant, and she felt Liam's gaze sharpen as he looked at her. "Look, let's get something to eat. I need to get some calories here." She met his gaze. "We can talk about it over dinner."

"Sure," Liam said, but his look belied his casual tone.

"Really, I'm all right. I just need a few minutes to get this straight in my head." Her tone was slightly exasperated, and he seemed to relax a bit as it seemed to signal to him that she was really alright.

"Okay. Come on. I think it's my turn to cook."

"Please, not chili again." Her tone was mock-desperate, and he smiled.

"I promise – no chili. Actually, I was thinking about beanie weenies…" his voice trailed off into an amused grin as she mimed outrage. He dropped an arm across her shoulders as they headed for the Volunteers' commissary.

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Part 5

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The commissary was large, meant to serve meals to the hundreds of Volunteers routinely stationed on board the Mothership. But now it was empty and silent, and their movements echoed eerily through the room. By mutual consent, they carried their food back to Liam's quarters in the section reserved for Companion Protectors. Because his duties had occasionally required him to remain overnight on the Mothership, Liam had kept quarters for his personal use, and he had several changes of clothes plus toiletries, some books, and even a small stereo with a selection of music.

Now, as they finished the last of their meal and stacked the various dishes and utensils, Liam leaned back and gave Renee his full attention.

"And Sa'ron really said that the Commonality was capable of feeling emotion?" His tone was thoughtful, as if he were working out the implications of her story.

"Yes, he did. And he said that it was because of my brother's emotions." She paused. "I'm not sure I like the implications of that. It makes me uncomfortable to think of the Taelons sifting through my brother's mind like that." She gave a shiver, unconsciously rubbing her hands along her upper arms as if she were cold.

Liam gave her a steady look, his gaze somehow knowing. For just a moment, there was a flash of blue deep in his green eyes as he spoke. "The Commonality doesn't know anything about his thoughts or his memories. Just his emotions, his feelings of love for you, and his feelings of fear and terror from his torture." 

He paused, with a thoughtful look once more, then continued slowly, "And it seems as though Da'an has not only learned about human emotions from his experience, but he has somehow spread that knowledge throughout the Commonality. Whether he did it knowingly and deliberately, or whether it is just some kind of side-effect of his connection to the Commonality, I don't really know. But I think it's going to definitely be in humanity's favor."

Renee's eyes widened at the implications. "You mean, you think the Taelons may actually gain some understanding of humanity because of my brother's emotions? Some sympathy for humans?" If so, this could be the kind of break they'd hoped for, that could turn the tide in this conflict. The thought of her brother being somehow the catalyst for this was, well, amazing and overwhelming and …. She shook her head in wonder and pride, feeling an ache in her chest at the thought of her little brother. 

"Maybe." Liam grinned at her, moving to pick up the dishes. "But first, we've got to get them back to Earth in one piece. In a manner of speaking."

She gave an answering grin as she rose to help him. 

***********

The next few days moved by in a blur. Their only indication of the passing of time was their own schedule; the unchanging lighting of the ship made it impossible to distinguish day from night. Of course, out here in the middle of interstellar space, countless light years from the star of their birth, counting "day" and "night" was simply a convenience, one that aided their human circadian rhythms to get the rest they needed to function. 

Fortunately, the sections of the ship set aside for humans' use had been adapted to adjust lighting levels during the "night". This helped humans adjust to their lives in space, as had been found decades earlier during the early manned space flights and, even before that, on submarines that spent months at a time submerged and out of touch with the surface world.

He stood in the darkness, watching the other two humans move past him and toward the corridor leading to the Companion Protectors' quarters. His face was its usual mask of control, marred only by the faint marks where the semi-living tendrils of the Jaridian probe had pierced his skin. Something flickered deep in his eyes, and his left hand came up to absently stroke the sleeve covering his skrill. He remained watching for a few moments after they had disappeared from his sight, then he turned and walked in the opposite direction with slow, measured steps, his expression thoughtful.

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Part 6

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Da'an turned his head slowly toward them on his biobed as Liam and Renee came through the doorway into the stasis wing. His energy pathways were dim, and he also hadn't bothered to put his human façade up. Renee knew it was Da'an because they had visited him here several times; she also knew that Liam recognized him in his natural energy state, as well as many of the other Taelons lying or sitting who had not yet entered the final death stasis. It still amazed her that Liam was so comfortable with the Taelons in their true forms. She still couldn't tell one from the other. 

Except Zo'or. There was no mistaking the almost frantic jerking of his fingers as he stood beside Da'an's bed. He straightened up as they moved closer, and without a word swept out of the chamber.

__

As if he's some kind of bloody emperor, Renee thought. _Well, I guess in some ways he is. And he's bloodier than Caligula ever was._

Liam turned to watch Zo'or depart, then turned his attention back to Da'an, helping him to sit up on the edge of the bed. Renee brought her attention back to hear what he was saying.

"How are you doing, Da'an?" His words were soft and full of concern.

The Taelon moved his hand in an attempt at one of his usual gestures. "I shall endure. Tell me, how are your efforts progressing?" 

"We have nearly half of the shuttlecraft and cruisers done, and the rest should go faster now that Ro'nar has set up an energy transfer conduit to the shuttlebay." At Da'an's questioning look, he explained. "It takes quite a while to transport the containers of core energy down to the engines, transfer the energy, and then carry them back up to the shuttle deck. So Ro'nar set up a transfer conduit, with a storage bottle at the end." He gestured toward where a group of Taelons knelt, conversing in soft tones. Renee assumed one of them was Ro'nar. "We just transfer the recovered core energy down to the engines, then head back to the shuttles. Then once the storage bottle is full, we just transfer the energy all at once into the engine pods. He set up a header that lets us split the transfer evenly between all the engines, so we don't have to constantly worry about balancing them. It works pretty well."

Renee added, "What he hasn't said is that it was his idea, and he had to convince Ro'nar that it was worth the effort." She ignored Liam's slight frown.

Da'an glanced from one to the other, then gave a slight nod. "Once again, Liam, your resourcefulness amazes me. I fear that spark no longer glows in my species." His words were even, but the sadness in them was apparent.

Liam looked uncomfortable, and his next words were on a different topic. "What has the Synod decided to do once we return to Earth?"

His fingers moving slowly yet with some agitation, Da'an spoke while his gaze wandered past Liam toward where his fellow Taelons sat or lay quietly, only occasionally conversing among themselves. "I fear most have given up hope of our survival. Even Zo'or cannot rouse them, and he has all but ceased trying." His fingers fluttered softly, then stilled. 

Gently, Liam reached out and took Da'an's hands in his. "Don't give up on us yet, Da'an. There's still time." His words were also soft, but there was an intensity in them that caused Da'an to look up at him, gazing deeply into Liam's eyes as if searching for something. 

With a final soft squeeze, Liam released his fingers. "We're gonna go get something to eat, then get a few hours' rest. See you tomorrow." Renee noticed that Liam's smile was gentle, and a memory surfaced of that same smile, this time aimed at her. _He looked at me that way after he…woke up. He smiled at me and told me to have faith._ She felt an echo of that same feeling now as Liam seemed to be wordlessly telling Da'an to hold on, to have faith. 

As Liam turned to leave the stasis chamber, Renee offered Da'an what she hoped was an encouraging smile, and slowly followed in Liam's wake. There were no words.

Behind their retreating forms, a second Taelon moved to stand near Da'an.

"I fear Major Kincaid's optimism will prove unfounded." Sa'ron's words were as sad as the fluttering of his fingers.

"Liam has proven to be right many times, in the face of almost insurmountable odds. I shall not abandon hope while he yet labors on our behalf." Da'an's words held a faint touch of reprimand.

Sa'ron frowned. "You seem to harbor an almost irrational faith in this human. I do not understand how this should be," he replied, then, as he was about to continue his thought, he stopped abruptly, eyes widening and mouth almost agape as a sudden realization hit him.

"He is the one! He is the Oracle!" Da'an heard Sa'ron's voice rise with excitement, then abruptly turn puzzled. "But how can this be? Prophecy says that the Oracle will be of the Kimera! How can a Human be the one?" His voice had attracted attention from several other Taelons nearby, and they moved closer, forming a ring around Da'an and Sa'ron. Their eyes were wide with questions, and Da'an could feel their puzzlement as they reached out to him through the Commonality.

As Da'an gazed wordlessly at his fellows, he knew he could no longer withhold the identity of the Oracle. There was too much at stake; it was time for truth. "Yes, Liam Kincaid is the Oracle. And yes, he is Kimera, as was foretold." His fellows gazed at him with expressions of stunned disbelief and dawning hope in their eyes as the information flowed outward through the Commonality.

**********

Sitting in his thronelike chair on the bridge, Zo'or felt a ripple of something move through the Commonality. In annoyed distraction, he tightened the barriers around his mind, continuing to distance himself from thoughts of the other Taelons. _They have nothing to say that I wish to hear, _he thought. _Merely more useless emotional appeals. They would rather wallow in their misery than seek to find a means of survival. Well, if they will not, then I will leave them to die. I will not die! I will survive! _His eyes glittered with almost feverish madness, and he was oblivious to the shadowy form of Ronald Sandoval who gazed at him impassively from the darkness, then turned and glided noiselessly away.

*****

Part 7

*****

Renee tugged at the coverall she wore, trying to pull it into a somewhat more comfortable fit. She glanced up in time to see Liam glance determinedly away, his face not showing any expression. But she saw his lips twitch, and she gave an exasperated sigh. Obviously, the Volunteer from whom she'd 'borrowed' this particular garment had been less – well, 'full-figured' wasn't exactly a word she wanted to use – than she was. She gave another sigh; she'd have to look through some of the lockers on the next level of the Volunteer quarters in the hope that she could find more clothes to wear that would fit. She **really** didn't want to wear a Volunteer uniform, but there weren't many civilian clothes in lockers here, and those that were seemed to be largely men's.

__

Of course, most of the Volunteers **are** men, so what did I expect? Renee gave one more, hopefully unobtrusive, tug at the coverall, then stood up to start gathering the breakfast dishes. Without a word, Liam began helping, still not looking at her.

"All right, go ahead and laugh! At least there isn't anyone taking pictures!" Renee's voice was half-rueful, half-laughing. As Liam's head came up, she held up a warning finger. "And you'd better not even think about it, mister!" 

"Who, me?" Liam's voice was trying too hard to sound innocent. He looked at her with his eyes slightly widened, and she burst out laughing. His grin widened into a chuckle.

"Okay, no pictures. I promise. But if Augur were here, he'd certainly have ideas about a new holo for his system!" Her gasp of outrage had him ducking away playfully as she mimed throwing a cup at him. Still chuckling, they deposited the remains of their breakfast in the disposal slot. 

As they walked out of the commissary, Liam draped an arm casually across Renee's shoulders, giving her a cheeky grin. She grinned back, and slid her arm around his waist to give him a quick hug. Arms around each other, they made their way down to the shuttlebay and another day of transferring the shuttles' core energy.

**********

With a loud thump, Ronald Sandoval deposited the full energy canister next to the transfer header, then paused to wipe the beads of sweat from his forehead. The movement reminded him of the marks on his face, and he thoughtfully ran his fingers across the one on his cheek, feeling it obviously healing well.

As he bent over to attach the conduit to the canister, his mind wandered from the routine task he was performing. He frowned as he tried once again to recall the events while he was under the control of the Jaridian probe. But still only fragments remained. 

He frowned once again as he recalled one of those fragments. Major Kincaid was talking to him – pleading with him? Why did he think that? He couldn't remember any actual words, but the look on Kincaid's face indicated he was trying to persuade Sandoval of something. A glimpse of movement; Renee Palmer holding something in her hands and staring at both him and Kincaid. And sorrow. Immense, overwhelming sorrow. Even the memory of it caused a tightness in his chest. 

He clamped down on the feeling ruthlessly. And resumed the struggle to remember. Somehow, Kincaid knew something about him. Something that affected him deeply. And judging by the look on Kincaid's face, Kincaid knew just how deeply, too. And that wasn't acceptable. It might make him vulnerable to Kincaid. And Palmer, too. She'd been watching; obviously she had heard it too, whatever it was.

He had to remember. He couldn't afford to be vulnerable. Not now.

Finishing the energy transfer, he moved the empty canister to where the others sat, ready for Major Kincaid and Miss Palmer to begin their shift. Resolutely, he set off down the corridor. He had a lot to do before he could return to his quarters for his usual three to four hours of rest.

Behind him, a figure moved out of the shadows. His pathways shining faintly, Sa'ron watched Zo'or's Protector leave unblinkingly, then moved quietly toward the cluster of canisters to await the arrival of the one he wanted to see.

*****

Part 8

*****

Arms still around each other in what she felt was half comforting companionship and half something else that she didn't want to examine too closely, Renee and Liam walked out of the corridor and into the ship's main docking bay. Renee was looking up at Liam, about to reply with another teasing remark about his giving up his jacket to Street, but she stopped abruptly as Liam came to a halt just inside the entrance. Looking ahead, she was surprised to see half a dozen Taelons standing near the canisters, obviously waiting for the two of them.

Dropping his arm and frowning, Liam moved forward to stand in front of the group. 

"What's going on? Is something wrong?" 

Sa'ron spoke for the group. "We are here to aid you in your endeavor. Apart from myself, these are the ones who have both the technical expertise and sufficient core energy levels to provide assistance." His words were steady and matter-of-fact, but he and his fellows kept their eyes on Liam, Renee noticed.

Liam merely looked at the group for a long moment, then turned and began directing individuals toward specific sections of the bay. Renee stood watching wordlessly, wondering what had just happened. Sa'ron saw her confusion, and moved toward her, his fingers fluttering softly. _At least I think it's Sa'ron. Now, how can I know that? _ She focused her attention as his words revealed that he was, indeed, the Taelon she had spoken with at length several days previously. Somehow, his air of fatalism had been replaced with… what, she wondered?

"Is there a difficulty, Miss Palmer?" His words continued to be soft, but his eyes turned toward where Liam was explaining their progress to the others.

"What's going on, Sa'ron? Why did all of you," she gestured with one slim hand, "just decide to come and help after all this time?"

His gaze returned to her, and he paused for a long moment. "There is an ancient _jhi'le'esa'a,_ what you would call a 'prophecy', which speaks of my species' long descent into entropy." His eyes were shining an intense blue now. "It says that in the time of greatest darkness, a light will walk among us. The light is called _krashii'ra na she'taal'_. The meaning is complex and not easily translated, but it is what you might call an "oracle", one who speaks truths that are not always easily understood.

"We believe that the Oracle is among us now."

Renee stared at him, speechless, as he gave her one last, long look before moving wordlessly to pick up one side of a canister. As he and his fellow Taelon moved off into the shadows of the docking bay, she turned toward Liam with a question on her lips.

"Not now, Renee. Let's just get to work." He held up a hand to halt her rush of words. "We'll talk later, in private. Please?"

She nodded silently and, with one long and hard look at Liam, turned to pick up a canister and move toward the waiting shuttles. 

She was uncharacteristically quiet for the rest of the shift, Liam noticed.

******** 

Later that day, as they and the Taelons departed from the echoing hanger, Renee still remained quiet. Liam watched her with unreadable eyes, but didn't break the silence until they approached their quarters.

"How about something to eat? Or do you want a shower first?" His tone was casual and matter-of-fact.

"Sure," she answered distractedly.

"Well, which is it?" He stopped abruptly, forcing her to stop, too.

"Huh?" She had obviously not been paying attention. "Oh, shower first, definitely."

"Okay, knock when you're ready."

"I will." Her attention was definitely not on dinner. As he opened the door of his quarters, Liam could feel Renee's eyes on him. 

Pushing back from the table and its silence, Liam abruptly stood up. "Okay. Enough already. Let's talk." As Renee opened her mouth to reply, Liam held up a hand. "Not here. Let's go to my quarters."

Realizing that all the listening and monitoring devices throughout the Mothership were now at the exclusive disposal of Zo'or and Sandoval, Renee merely nodded and followed Liam wordlessly from the commissary. Behind them, their half-finished supper dishes bore mute testimony to their mutual distraction.

Entering his quarters, Liam waved the lights to a lower level. Motioning Renee toward his bunk, Liam pulled out the room's only chair and sat. He gazed at Renee wordlessly, obviously waiting for her to begin.

She started to speak, then broke off, moving her hands in a gesture of confusion, or maybe frustration.

Liam decided to start. "Okay, tell me what happened this morning. What's got you so spooked?"

Taking a deep breath, she began to tell him of her conversation with Sa'ron. As she finished, he dropped his gaze to his hands. "So, Sa'ron evidently believes you are this "Oracle" from their prophecy, and are the one who's going to 'lead them out of their darkness' or something," she finished, her serious gaze at odds with her matter-of-fact tone. 

He looked at his hands a moment longer, then with a sigh brought his gaze up to meet hers. "Da'an has evidently told them who I am, or at least part of it. That's the only explanation for Sa'ron's comments, and also for their sudden appearance today."

"So, what's an 'Oracle'? Is this part of this 'destiny' of yours that Da'an keeps talking about? How can you be, if you're not Kimera any more?" Somehow, after watching him die (again!) and seeing him return to life practically in front of her eyes, the rest of this seemed somehow – tame. _Or maybe I'm just on emotional overload. My best friend dies and returns from the dead, of course it makes sense that he's some kind of 'saviour'. _The thoughts were running madly through her head, and she resisted the urge to laugh hysterically. _But for the Taelons? They murdered the Kimera; now they're slowly murdering humanity. How can he be destined to save them from extinction? Why would they be worth saving?_

Almost as if he could hear the thoughts going through her head – scary thought! He must just know her so well he could read her expressions – Liam began speaking carefully. "Yes, I seem to be the Kimera Oracle that Da'an says they have been watching for. Apparently he's thought that almost from the beginning." He paused, as if gathering his thoughts. Renee continued to watch him, and his eyes looked deep into hers, flickers of bright blue mixed with the usual sea-green. Apparently reaching a decision, he reached forward and took her hands in his.

"There's a lot of this I still don't understand, but I think I owe it to you to tell you everything I can. And to be honest, I think I just want someone to talk to about it. Maybe just to keep my feet on the ground, maybe to just hold my hand while I scream into my pillow." His tone was wry; somehow, she knew he wasn't joking.

*****

Part 9

*****

Keeping her eyes locked on Liam's, Renee shifted her position on the edge of the bed. Although he sat calmly in the room's only chair an arm's length away from her, she could feel the tension in him, like a tight coil. For all his apparent calmness, his eyes gave away his inner turmoil. Calling on her years of patience learned in long, difficult sessions in board rooms and at the bargaining table, Renee tried to relax and wait for him to begin. It wasn't easy; she wanted to demand answers, ask questions, vent some of the anger and uncertainty that churned inside her. 

"Actually, it starts a long time ago. And I do mean long…." Liam continued to hold her hands in a gentle grip, lowering his eyes to their clasped hands as he spoke. "About eight million years ago, to be exact."

"That's when the Kimera found them. They were dying. That was hardly an unusual occurrence." His lips twisted slightly, echoing the touch of irony in his tone. "There are a great many races that have grown up throughout the Universe, only to fall into extinction for a variety of reasons. And the Kimera studied them all, observing, learning, and preserving their memories, their culture, even their essence, within the personal and racial memories of the Kimera." His voice was soft and distracted, as if he spoke of what he had witnessed himself. She felt a shiver go down her at the implications.

"But this time, things were different. Things went wrong." He looked up at her, catching her eyes with his. "The Kimera had very strong laws about interference with the fate of a species. They believed each species had the right to survive or perish on its own merits, or through its own efforts of interaction or cooperation with other species. The Kimera themselves would not interfere on behalf of a species, although," he gave a bit of a wry grin, "it wasn't unusual for them to help an individual or small group."

"But this time, they broke their own laws. The Kimera Council felt so strongly that this species was worthy of survival, that they interfered and attempted to save them from extinction. And they succeeded, at least for a time." She watched as he dropped his gaze to their hands, giving a slight squeeze and stroking his thumbs across the backs of her hands. Renee struggled to keep her attention focused on Liam's words, but the sensations his touch was stirring in her were distracting, to say the least. 

"But the changes the Kimera wrought were too great, and things began to cycle violently. A previously peaceful people suddenly had learned, and come to crave, violence and dominance. Not all, and those who were appalled by the changes and the violence sought to find a way to leave them behind. Others chose to embrace the changes, and all they brought. The two sides became implacable enemies."

"So that's how the Taelons and Jaridians separated into two races?" Renee thought she could see where this was going.

Liam nodded. "Yes. Those who sought to shed their violent emotions and needs banded together, and began to search for a way to change themselves. But they failed. Until, once again, the Kimera interfered." She strained to hear him as his voice trailed off softly. He sat, silent, as she waited for him to continue.

"What happened?" Her own voice was barely above a whisper as she encouraged him to go on.

"The Kimera helped them create the Commonality. And, in return, they exterminated the entire Kimera race." 

Even though she had known that the Taelons were responsible for the extinction of the Kimera, it was somehow chilling to hear Liam's words and the flat tone he spoke in. She spoke to reassure him. "But that was millions of years ago, Liam. You had nothing to do with it, and the Taelons of today had nothing to do with it."

"Ha'gel was there." She froze at his words, and locked gazes with him as he once again met her eyes. She could see the pain of the memories. God, he must be experiencing them as if they were his own! She could only wait, mute, for him to continue. 

"He was one of those assigned to the study of the dying species, and even though he spoke against their interference in the Council, they chose to disregard his advice and proceeded with their efforts to save them. And when it all began to fall apart, and it looked like even the best efforts of the Kimera could not save either of the split races, it was Ha'gel who was there."

"It was Ha'gel who gave the Taelons the Commonality." 

Renee felt frozen; she barely had enough breath to whisper the words: "Oh, my God…"

"Exactly." His voice was as soft as hers, and through her shock she could feel his hands shaking in hers. "That's why the Taelons considered Ha'gel a criminal, and wanted to see him dead no matter what. To the Taelons, it was Ha'gel who was responsible for everything that happened to their race, for the war with the Jaridians, for every evil and every shortcoming and every failure of the Taelons."

The abject misery in his voice cut her to the core. Pulling on his hands, she drew him to a seat beside her on the bunk and wordlessly wrapped her arms around him. She could feel him trembling, whether from his own emotions, or those of Ha'gel conjured forth from his mind, or a combination. Resting her cheek against his hair, she tightened her embrace, offering comfort in spite of her own shock and distress. There were no words possible, or necessary.

But after a few moments, she felt him draw away, and she slowly, reluctantly, allowed her arms to relax their embrace. She felt her breath catch in her throat as his lips touched her temple, and then felt the press of his cheek against hers. Drawing away, he slid his hands down her arms to recapture her fingers in his, again lowering his gaze to their clasped hands.

"There's more," he continued in a somewhat husky tone. "You see, along with the other genetic alterations designed to save the species from extinction, one of the 'gifts' that the Kimera bequeathed to the Taelons was prescience." At her look of astonishment, he explained. "The Kimera had the gift of foresight, sometimes an astonishingly long time in the future. Actually," Liam's lips quirked slightly, perhaps anticipating her reaction, "what they could foresee was probabilities."

"Probabilities? You mean they could see the future? Predict what was going to happen? But then, how could they get surprised by the Taelons?" Renee's tone was sharp.

Liam smiled at her predictable grasp of the logical flaw. "'There is none so blind as he who will not see.' They couldn't see if they refused to look." He paused for a moment, then continued in a tone that made her think he was accessing his Kimera memories again. "The Kimera were an old race. Da'an described them as a 'proto-species', but that's not entirely correct. They were **the** proto-species, or the descendants of it." He looked into her eyes once more, and this time she almost felt the weight of the heritage he bore weighing him down. "The first sentient species in this universe, Renee. They saw it all, from the beginning. Until their time was past. Until it was time for their descendants."

Renee's eyes widened, as she felt a suffocating sense of emotion squeeze her chest at the implications of his words. "Oh, my…. They were….. You can…. Oh….." Her voice trailed off as she simply looked at him, her eyes wide and dark with stunned amazement, almost disbelief. She struggled to understand what he was saying, what he was telling her about his father's people. And about himself.

With a nervous, almost panicked, movement, Renee stood up to pace in the small room. This was too much; she just had to _move_. Distractedly, she ran a hand through her hair, pushing it back from her face as she struggled to know what to say, what to do. As she turned back toward Liam and opened her mouth to speak, her eyes were caught by his, their gray-green depths shot with blue-green and gold flecks of fire. For a moment, she felt as if she were falling into their dark depths, and she swayed dizzily. 

Liam's eyes widened in alarm, and the lock of their gazes was broken as he stood to steady her. "Hey, don't bail out on me now. Renee?"

"I'm okay. I just…. It's all just a little much." Was she even making sense? Her tongue felt all thick and fuzzy, and she wasn't really sure her brain wasn't off somewhere else… She took a deep breath, feeling his hands steadying her. "I'm okay. Really." She smiled, trying to reassure him, and maybe herself as well.

"Here, sit. You sure you're okay?" His tone was worried, and the very ordinariness of it was comforting.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Really." She was glad for the steadiness of the bunk, but hardly ready to admit it even to herself.

"Hang on, I'll be right back." She opened her mouth, but Liam had disappeared out the door of his room. She heard his footsteps faintly in the corridor, then the sound of another door. In a few moments, the footsteps sounded again, and he closed the door carefully behind him.

"What's that?"

"It's from Captain Anderson's private stock. He doesn't like to go all the way to the Protectors' common room for his evening brandy, so he keeps a bottle of the good stuff in his room." As he spoke, he was pouring a measure into each of the two tumblers he had already set on the desk. Handing one to Renee, he raised the other in a wordless toast, and raised it to his lips. After a slight hesitation, Renee did the same, and felt the smooth liquor burn its way down her throat. Lowering the glass, she met Liam's eyes over the rim. "Thanks."

"You're welcome. I think we both needed that." He took another sip, then rolled the glass between his hands as he moved over to sit beside Renee on the bunk.

Thoughtfully, she took another sip, enjoying the slow warmth spreading inside her as the very good - _and obviously very expensive_ - brandy worked its particular magic. She'd had no idea Captain Anderson had such excellent taste. 

******

Part 10

******

Frowning at the unresponsive console, he punched the recalcitrant button once again. And once again, there was no response. 

"Damn it!" As his fist struck the surface of the console in frustration, Agent Sandoval was unaware of the softly glowing brilliant blue eyes regarding him from the shadows. With a final look at the human, Sa'ron slowly moved away from the corner, gliding almost silently into the shadows of the corridor.

At the soft and barely-heard rustle of cloth, all but inaudible above the faint hum of the living bioslurry of the mothership, Sandoval whirled around. Scanning the shadows, he could see no sign of any presence. With quick steps, he approached the room's exit, but there was no one visible down the length of the corridor. Continuing to peer into the darkness in the bends and turns of the corridor, he waited and listened with all the intensity of his CVI-enhanced senses. But there was no further sound or movement.

Slowly turning back to the console, he quickly cleared all evidence of his activities while continuing to listen in vain for any more sounds of intrusion. Then, once again fingering the fading marks on his cheek, he set his face in its usual impassive mask and strode swiftly into the shadowy depths of the mothership.

************

The sound of a deep sigh caused Renee to raise her eyes to Liam once again. He was gazing into his glass, his thoughts obviously on something other than the brandy. She started to speak, then caught herself. 

__

What do I say now? 'Very interesting.' How about 'Gee, that's impressive'? Her thoughts raced around, seeming to bounce back and forth; any direction except confronting the startling revelations her best friend and partner had just imparted. _I just don't know how to deal with this, after everything else. _As she watched Liam continue to stare at his glass, another thought occurred to her. _How does Liam deal with this knowledge, this heritage? Did he really mean it before, about wanting to scream into his pillow, or was that just for my benefit? I know if it was me, that's the least I'd be doing. _ One question did occur to her, and she used it to break the silence.

"Liam?" Her question caused him to raise his head and gaze at her with a look that was at once open and guarded. At his continued silence, she continued on to ask the question. "Does Da'an know all of this? I mean, about Ha'gel and the first Taelons, and everything?"

Liam softly shook his head. "No, not the details. The actual events happened so long ago, and time has a way of distorting and blurring events. The Taelons have stories and legends about some parts of what happened, but even those alive at the time never knew the full story of the Kimera's role. I suspect that a lot of the truth was also deliberately hidden. The Taelons of today believe that the Kimera tried to genetically assimilate them, and blame that as the reason for their 'war' of genocide against the Kimera. The Kimera's collective sense of guilt at violating their own highest laws, together with their culture of nonaggression, contributed to their extermination at the hands of the Taelons." He was silent a moment, then continued softly, "I doubt the truth really matters to anyone anymore. We just have to deal with the consequences." 

"So now what?" At his inquiring look, she went on. "I mean, I see how the Taelons got to be where they are now, but how does this tie in with all this talk of an 'Oracle'?"

Renee watched as Liam rose to his feet to pace the few steps possible in the small room. He seemed to be searching for words as he ran one hand through his hair distractedly. Again, she bit back the words that came to her lips, knowing that her friend didn't need her to make things any harder for him. With his back to her, he started speaking softly. "This is where things get a bit fuzzy." He turned to face her, having apparently come to some sort of decision. Sitting once again on the bunk beside her, he took the brandy glass from her hand and set it on the desk beside his own. Then, taking her hands once again in his, he looked at her deeply as if making sure she was ready to listen. She could only look back at him steadily, hoping that he read her resolve in her eyes.

"The Taelons have known for over three thousand years that they are dying. Da'an told me that, and Julianus told us the same thing on Ma'el ship before he died. Ma'el's researches led him here, to Earth, as the salvation of the Taelon species." 

"A key part of Ma'el's research focused on the Taelon legend and prophecy of Umrathma and Shaqarava. Like a lot of prophecies, it is more allegorical rather than factual, but it does include some specific details." At her look of disbelief, he smiled slightly, his lips a wry twist. "I gather that you're not a believer in 'prophecy'."

"I've always thought it was so much mumbo-jumbo. I mean, all the 'prophecies' I've ever heard are so vague that you can interpret them any way you want to. And people do, and then they fight each other over their own version of 'the truth'. Then, when something happens, everyone sits around with twenty-twenty hindsight and sanctimoniously insists that they 'knew' it was going to happen to make themselves feel big or important or something." She shook her head. "No, I've never really believed that prophecies are real. But then, there was a time when I didn't believe in aliens, either." She gave a slight grin, which he returned, sharing the joke.

"Well, in this case maybe you should consider being a bit less skeptical."

"Go on," she encouraged, apparently willing to listen.

"Umrathma and Shaqarava were brothers. It's a long story, but essentially they had a falling out, and Umrathma banished Shaqarava. In some versions, he killed him. The prophecy predicts the return of Shaqarava and that he will vanquish Umrathma." He looked down at his hands, turning them upward so that the palms were visible. Renee waited for him to continue, but he continued staring down at his palms. After a few moments of silence, she prodded him gently to continue.

"Tell me."

Liam continued, in a quiet voice. "I'm 'Shaqarava'. And Zo'or is 'Umrathma'." He fell silent, staring at his hands.

"And you know this… how?" 

He hesitated for a long moment. "About a thousand years ago, the Taelons on an outpost world in our galaxy retrieved a life capsule. When they opened it, instead of a Taelon they found a Kimera." He looked up into her eyes. "He had been trapped in the stasis capsule for nearly two million years, since the extermination of the last worlds of the Kimera."

"Was it…Ha'gel?"

Liam nodded. "Yes. He escaped, in much the same way that he did here on Earth. Only this time, he was loose in a colony of Taelons. His body was already driving him to take a mate, and he couldn't sense any of the Kimera; as far as he knew, he was alone. And as he learned more of the Taelons from his host, he began to despair of what he had helped to create."

"But his body's needs drove him, and at last he found and took a Taelon mate. Then, to protect his mate and child, he drew his pursuers away with him, fleeing to an orbital station and from there to a ship just departing into ID space. Finally, cornered and close to exhaustion, he created a diversion and launched himself from the ship into space in another stasis capsule. Eventually, that capsule fell into Earth's oceans and lay there undisturbed for nearly a millennium." 

"But Ha'gel never knew the fate of the child he created, a child whose parent carefully concealed his parentage. And in the midst of their joyous celebration of this last-born child of theirs, the Taelons never noticed the differences. But the child knew, and held himself apart, even within the Commonality."

He held her gaze with his own. "The child's name was Zo'or."

Renee stared at him in total shock. "Oh, my …! He's your…?"

"Yeah," Liam commented quietly. They both fell silent. 

********* 


End file.
